How to Plan a Wedding

April 21, 2010

Seriously, does anyone know how to plan a wedding?  The fact that I’m actually going to get married is sometimes even harder to wrap my head around, it always seemed like something so far away, and beyond the realms of this world.  I never was the girl who dreamed of getting married, I was busy running around, jumping over things, building forts, and reading adventure books.  I have never once pictured what my wedding day would look like, my Barbies were too busy having fashions shows, they didn’t have time for such silliness. 

However here we are, and Mr. J and I are busy trying to figure out what we want to do.  We both agree we are going to feel very uncomfortable standing in front of a lot of people (staring at us!!! ahhhhh!!!) and saying vows, but its still what we want to do.  We want small, we want simple, we want nice, good.  I also wanted to get married somewhere that we both like, that is presentable enough to not need decorations, that could look after a quality dinner, and a place we could return on anniversaries.  I was amazing adamant on that last point, which negated getting married at home, since we will eventually move to a different house.  I also nixed a courthouse or eloping idea ( I think Mr. J nixed that one as well) since I’m pretty sure the parents would like a nice wedding to attend, and the whole walking down the aisle thingy. 

So we will begin with a problem statement:

(In bold) How to plan a Wedding

Then we will break the problem down into steps in order to make it more manageable.  Good engineers do this all the time, breaking complex problems down into tiny steps (Go to the Moon – measure distance to the moon etc.)

Step 1: Buy a notebook to write everything down.

Step 2: Make a guest list – this should help us with the venue, as I assume it will be the venue-person’s first question. 

So there you go, we’ve completed Step 1, and are working on Step 2.  Now that is progress!! 

We also have a mission statement – Keep it simple.  We’re repeated this one many, many times already

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9 Responses to “How to Plan a Wedding”

  1. Anne said

    It’s a lot of details, for sure! FWIW, I think having buffet or at least mobile food is easier than a sit-down in terms of organization and troop movements. I’m glad to offer an opinion on anything specific you want to ask – I’ve ALWAYS got an opinion. 😉

  2. Carla said

    Anne is right about the mobile food. I have been to only one wedding where the sit down dinner worked out, and its was a very expensive wedding indeed. You pay more, the food isn’t as nice. We did italian picnic food at our wedding. Nothing had to be hot, and we could afford to offer seconds. Also, don’t run out of beer.

    Your step 2 might be “choose an upper limit to your budget”. Decide how much is too much.

  3. margene said

    Can you do something outdoors? Some of the most beautiful weddings I’ve been to have been in outdoor venues.

  4. Cheryl S. said

    Simple is good. You’ve outlined the important things, the rest is gravy.

  5. Jocelyn said

    I am happy to loan you my event planning skill, girl!

  6. sayingthings said

    I was the world’s most hesitant wedding planner. That may explain why the invitations went out (finally) about, oh, 7 weeks before the wedding.

    I think starting with a tentative guest list is good. It can be a trap, though. Because if you’re starting off just with that, nothing else in mind, then your guest list is likely to grow and grow and grooooow.

    I made a guest list, then thought about the other basics (venue, food, the big costs, you know) and then looked at the budget and decided how many of the guests I could realistically invite. I pared it down and down, and ended up with the small wedding I had pictured at the first (with the original guest list, it wouldn’t have been so small, and it would have cost a lot more. In my case, almost all the cost was in the food. It was damn good food, though. You might take a different approach, of course.) We really needed to keep the cost within our planned budget, so that was very important. It was still a good party and I remember it with extreme fondness. I should have put you on the guest list. Doh. (you didn’t get cut! I just didn’t know you as well back then.)

  7. Rycrafty said

    If you need an extra set of hands, or an extra planning brain, it is what I do. 🙂 Well, not weddings, but event planning and executive assistant-ing are all part of my life in theatre.

  8. melanie said

    I could help to if you want. I never had big dreams about my ‘future wedding’ either when I was growing up and so wedding planning was a new experience. My big thing while planning our wedding was “how much crap can we cut out!” And it was A LOT. (But not Alot, he wasn’t invited.) And sometimes it is just nice to have someone to talk to. You could sit down with Joce and I about this – since we both grew up here we might be able to help with venue suggestions.

  9. Bronwen said

    The biggest tip I learned through planning my own wedding (and then a few years as a professional fundraising gala coordinator)… DON’T TELL ANY OF THE VENDORS YOU’RE CHECKING OUT THAT IT’S A WEDDING. Tell them you’re “hosting a reception” or “planning a small get-together”. As soon as those wedding bells ring the $$ skyrockets. AND nobody believes you when you tell them you want to Keep It Simple Stupid. At least that was my experience anyway. Congratulations and good luck!

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